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Perry Gatner

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NeutralNPC 32Perry Gatner
Perry Gatner
Gender Male
Race Human (Humanoid)
Level 60
Health 9,200
Reaction Alliance Horde
Position Stand-up Comedian
Location Shattrath City
See Icon-3D-48x48

Perry Gatner is a stand-up comedian who occasionally appears in the World's End Tavern in Shattrath City. He tells a variety of jokes as well as impersonations of the various playable races. Haris Pilton makes a few comments about his jokes.

Shattrath Saul lets you know about the act saying:

Shattrath Saul says: Check out the comedy stylings of Perry Gatner in just a few minutes!
Shattrath Saul says: If you are ready to laugh, head over to the World's End Tavern!

EventEdit

Shows happen at various times (all times server time): Around 4pm every afternoon; 8pm every night; 8:09am Sundays. (Jokes may appear in a different order per show.)

Albert Quarksprocket: Thank you all for coming tonight. Now put your hands together to welcome Shattrath's best, Perry Gatner!
Perry Gatner: I never met a tauren I didn't like...
Perry Gatner: To eat!!
Perry Gatner: What a good looking crowd. The dwarven women even shaved.
Perry Gatner: Have you ever noticed that all those cute, orc kids look the same?
Perry Gatner: It's too bad they don't stay cute. There must be some right of passage in the Barrens called, "Climb ugly tree and fall out."
Perry Gatner: Last week I was in Goldshire. Have you been there?
Perry Gatner: That town's so small, I asked a kid to draw me a map. He drew it on the back of a Defias Wanted poster...
Perry Gatner: to scale!!
Perry Gatner: Impersonation time!!! I call this, "The Silly Tauren."
The comedian clears his throat.
The comedian impersonates a tauren.

He performs an impersonation through voice. (turn up volume to hear)

Perry Gatner: Here's a good one, why do watermelons have water in them?
Perry Gatner: Because they are planted in the spring!
Haris Pilton: That joke's hot.
Perry Gatner: Goldshire's Inn advertises a lakeside view...
Perry Gatner: I saw a murloc swim by my window.
Perry Gatner: Hey! Hey! Hey! It's Raliq the Drunk... His momma's so fat she didn't just make the front cover of Ogre Today...
Perry Gatner: She made the back cover too!
Perry Gatner: What's the deal with women? I mean they are always like...
The comedian clears his throat.
The comedian impersonates a human female.

He performs an impersonation through voice. (turn up volume to hear)

Perry Gatner: And then gnomes are even worse! They are always saying stuff like...
The comedian clears his throat.
The comedian impersonates a gnome.

He performs an impersonation through voice. (turn up volume to hear)

Perry Gatner: How many kobolds does it take to change a lantern wick?
Perry Gatner: You no take candle!
Haris Pilton: That's hot.
Perry Gatner: Hey, it's Raliq the drunk... His momma's so fat, when she flies to Blade's Edge they charged her by the pound!
Perry Gatner: What do you call a broken boomerang?
Perry Gatner: A stick!
Perry Gatner: I love blood elf women. Especially when they say stuff like this...
The comedian clears his throat.
The comedian impersonates a blood elf.

He performs an impersonation through voice. (turn up volume to hear)

Perry Gatner: What time is it when an Elekk sits on your fence?
Perry Gatner: Time to get a new fence!!
Perry Gatner: How desperate do you have to be for allies that you recruit your livestock?
Perry Gatner: I own a dog, but I'm not giving him a sword.
Haris Pilton: Psshh... whatever.
Haris Pilton: I, like, so don't get it...
Perry Gatner: Come on! These jokes are epic!
Perry Gatner: Used to be you couldn't trust a goblin...
Perry Gatner: Who am I kiddin'? If you trade with goblins you'd better have iron plating in your coinpurse.
Perry Gatner: One last impersonation. It's tough, but let's see if you can guess who it is...
The comedian clears his throat.
The comedian impersonates an orc.

He performs an impersonation through voice. (turn up volume to hear)

Perry Gatner: You guys have been a great audience! Have a good night!
Perry Gatner: Now that the show's done, can someone run me through Scarlet Monestary?
Albert Quarksprocket: Perry Gatner! What an act! The cantina is open all night long, so please, stay and enjoy yourselves!

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